Today is my surgery day. I had my last meal for dinner. We just threw it together - chicken, eggplant, mushrooms. I was so tired of everything being the last thing...the last pizza, last diet coke, last mexican feast. I did not care anymore, so we had a nondescript, kind of blah meal. But I was happy with that.
In about 15 minutes I am leaving for the hospital. I am nervous, but excited at the same time. I am nervous because I have read a lot of crazy things online...It seems a lot of people go to Tijuana to have lap band done because they don't have insurance and it's very inexpensive to have surgery in Mexico. So I have read lots of stories that people go to Mexico, have surgery and come back only to discover that they were scammed and did not actually get the band implanted. That's my fear. Aside from my fears of having my organs stolen, this is another.
I know that the success of my surgery depends on me. I am prepared for that and I know I can do it, but I just keep thinking... "What if...?" What if I die? What if it's a scam? What if I get really sick? What if it does not work? I guess I just have to have faith that it will work.
To wrap up, I am excited and thankful that my surgery is finally here. It's the beginning and also an end. A beginning to an exciting, joyful experience and and end to fruitless struggling and a life where I looked and felt like this:
Monday, December 22, 2008
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2 comments:
Way to go, Matt! You have made our lives richer through sharing your journey. We are proud of you. We are blessed by having you in our lives. The best is yet to be.
Love,
Becky
Matty,
I am so proud of you! I appreciate your willingness to ensure your good health for your wife, your children, your family, and your friends. This is another one of those times that I sit back and wonder, "Why was I the blessed mother who got the opportunity to raise a son like you?". I apologize for the genes you inherited! We will all struggle together, but we will certainly enjoy the fellowship along the way!
You are incredibly brave and I admire your strong faith and incredible sense of humor. You make all of us laugh in times of stress.
I pray for a pain-free day for you and love you so very much.
Mom
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